7 Steps to Loving the Person You Wanted to Kill

Jesus said that even when we are angry with a brother, we are subject to judgment for murder.  Even thinking You good for nothing” or “You fool!” when you are irritated with someone is like murder. The other title of this post is “7 Love Reminders for Myself.”

Here is a mnemonic: BATUKAN.

B- (This) Body is God’s temple. Breathe in, breathe out. Relax.  Let your body get to its calm state ready to take in the Lord’s Spirit and the Word.  Your body is your living sacrifice to God. When you allow God to be Boss over your body and what it wants to do, that is true and proper worship.

Rom 12:1 Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship.

Lord, be the Boss of my body.  I need Your peace. You will keep me in perfect peace when my mind is steadfast because I trust You. Please help me to be gentle, not be anxious but by prayer and petition, in all things, I present my requests to You:  this… this… this…. so that Your peace which transcends all understanding will guard my heart and mind in Christ Jesus.

A- Ask the Holy Spirit to be Boss over your feelings and mind.

God is greater than our hearts. The mind can be constantly transformed and renewed according to God’s Word so that it doesn’t go with the flow of the world and the flesh. What’s acceptable the the world is not necessarily acceptable to God.

Rom 8:26 In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans. 27 And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for God’s people in accordance with the will of God.

Lord, take over my heart and mind. Give me the mind of Christ. How do You see this person? How do You love this person.  You are greater than my heart and feelings. Help me in my weakness. I am so irritated/ dismayed/ frustrated/ angry but with the same power You raised Jesus from the dead, I believe You can help me to behave in accordance with Your character for victory is not by might nor power, not by the way I can express myself or the way I can make this person feel bad for the mistakes made, but by Your Spirit.

T- Tuhurin mo!” – Ptr. Bong Saquing. 

Tuhod = knee. Use your knee…in prayer, isumbong mo (Report the offense) to the Lord! Completely! With Abandon! Tell God everything!  He will take it.

Lam 2:19a Arise, cry out in the night, as the watches of the night begin; pour out your heart like water in the presence of the Lord

Psalm 55:22a Cast your burden upon the Lord and He will sustain you.

Lord, You know Everything that happened.  This… and this… and this… and this… and this… and this… I give these ALL to You.  You are opposed to the proud but give grace to the humble.  Help me to be humble and to submit to Your will.  Help me to be more like You in thought, word, and deed. Speak to me, help me listen and follow You. What are You teaching me?

Photo from http://www.juliegillies.com/2013_05_01_archive.html
Photo from http://www.juliegillies.com/2013_05_01_archive.html
U- Understand that the battle is not against flesh and blood (a.k.a. people).  That person is not your enemy. Your common enemy is the devil.

Ephesians 6:12New International Version (NIV)
12 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.

Lord help me to see that this person is not at all my enemy, that no person is an enemy. Our common enemy is Satan who wants to steal, kill, and destroy unity, friendship, relationships, harmony, joy, peace, people.  Help me to put on Your full armor specially to know Your Word, the only offensive weapon to fight with.

K- Keep your mouth shut until you have taken this matter up with the Lord extensively.  Saying things without prayer will add to the problem.  I should know [knock on my forehead].

Ephesians 4:29-30New International Version (NIV)
29 Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. 30 And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption.

Lord, teach me what to say, what not to say. Even in my countenance, tone, voice, in the non-verbal ways I am expressing myself, help me to be aligned with what You want.  After I have spoken the truth in love to confront the person in a way edifying, please help me to be still and know that You are God.

A- Allow God to move.  Would you like an all-knowing, almighty, all-good Being or a limited, limited, limited person to handle it?

Romans 12:18-20New International Version (NIV)
18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. 19 Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,”says the Lord. 20 On the contrary:

“If your enemy is hungry, feed him;
    if he is thirsty, give him something to drink.
In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.”

Lord, if I love only those who are lovable, what credit is that to me? You are calling me to be kind to the one who is acting like the enemy.  You are the one who will defend my cause if it is righteous.

N- No to anger.
James 1:19 My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, 20 because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires.

Ephesians 4:30-32
30 And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. 31 Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. 32 Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.

NO japanese gesture

Lord, I have so many things I want to say to be satisfied.  Help me to use my passing life to be glorifying to You.  Please help me to do what You are telling me to do and not just keep listening.  Help me to put into action my faith.  Help me to speak in a way that builds up the person and inspires them to be better. I am not capable of doing this on my own but Your Spirit will enable me.

Lord, if this person is being hard-hearted, please, batukan Nyo sya (hit this person on the head).  But if I’m the one being hard-hearted, thank You, ako ang kailangan batukan (I’m the one who needs to be hit on the head).

Please help me to love like You do.  Not my will but Your will be done.  If I believe in You that You are God but I do not obey You, that doesn’t make me any different from demons.

James 2:19 You believe that there is one God. Good! Even the demons believe that—and shudder.

Please help me to behave as Your true child, not by my goodness but by Your Holy Spirit, by Your grace. As I abide in You, You will enable me to not be a murderer in my mind but a lover like You  in Jesus’s name amen.

3 Comments Add yours

  1. loren lee says:

    Hi karen! kamusta?
    This is one of my favorite posts 🙂 Good to learn about God’s principles in dealing with people -particularly difficult ones! It’s a challenge of faith when we learn to respond lovingly towards those who.hurt or offend us,just as God lovingly corrects and disciplines us. 🙂 it’s a day by day challenge for us entrepreneurs especially when dealing with clients / suppliers/ employees when they are being too demanding or seemingly unreasonable!

    I appreciate your blog so much by the way! I praise God for giving you the wonderful talent to put into words your experiences so that it may point people back to Him! 🙂

    1. Wow praise God and glory to God that this blog is a blessing to you Loren! Yes it’s my desire that it would point back to Him! Thank you for appreciating! A new day again to put into practice our faith! May we be Spirit-filled today in Jesus’s name amen.

      1. loren lee says:

        Amen. 🙂

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