After being asked to participate in serving at a ministry event, I realized that the entire time that I was doing work before, during, and after the two hour event, I was in my element. My mountain of circumstances was far, far away from my mind and heart. Instead, thoughts and energies were focused on what would glorify God for this event. And so joy index shot up. Reminds me of what another sister in Christ shared with me: the recipe for joy: J-esus first, O-thers next, Y-ou last.
Seeing God’s hand at orchestrating even the littlest details fitting together to fulfill His purpose is awesome. One couldn’t help but know He is alive and at work. Being back in ministry despite my work-in-progress status encouraged me greatly that despite my repeated failures in letting go of anger, God can use me. Remembering that I am part of God’s family nonetheless restored my vision of who I am (child of the King of Kings) and whose I am (I am His!).
I was reminded that the portrait of God’s family in the Bible consists of imperfect people saved by grace. I thank God for the Bible that reveals truths such as this; otherwise, I would have thought that one could only be part of God’s family if he were perfect. But repeatedly, the Bible shows us that only Jesus is righteous, humans are not, especially after Jesus raised the bar of holiness to include thought life (just thinking of adultery or getting angry with someone is like committing adultery and murder, etc.) Psalm 143:2, Romans 3:10 and 20, 1John 1:8 and 10.
If God’s view is that I am His daughter through faith in Jesus Christ (1John 1:12), then I am. If I am His daughter, I ought to behave as such. Whether I am a child of God or the enemy will be evident by what I choose to do. God has already given me the Holy Spirit to empower me to choose right but I need to die to self and yield moment by moment to His leading. I need to consider what God wants more important than what I think, want, or feel. The blessing of following God’s way comes only after I have obeyed.
For now, I thank the Lord for being reminded of who I am and that even if I have failed, He is giving me a new chance. If I were in a movie, this would be a scene from the Lion King (except the “you are the one true king” part which belongs only to Jesus Christ).
The Lion King (1994)
Rafiki: [after guiding Simba to a spot where he says will show him Mufasa] Look down there.
Adult Simba: [looks into a pool of water] That’s not my father. That’s just my reflection.
Rafiki: No, look harder.
[touches the water, as it ripples Simba’s reflection changes to that of his father]
Rafiki: You see? He lives in you.
Mufasa’s ghost: [from above] Simba.
Adult Simba: Father?
Mufasa’s ghost: [apears among the stars] Simba, you have forgotten me.
Adult Simba: No. How could I?
Mufasa’s ghost: You have forgotten who you are and so forgotten me. Look inside yourself, Simba. You are more than what you have become. You must take your place in the Circle of Life.
Adult Simba: How can I go back, I’m not who I used to be.
Mufasa’s ghost: Remember who you are. You are my son. Remember who you are. Remember…